Success Sunday (PostID 1125)
“That isn’t to say we should stop collecting data, framing it in hypothesis, and testing those hypotheses. The scientific method is still an awesome machine…if we understand its limits.”
–Pquincy
So why this quote? Well it is two-fold. I understand that some bloggers are having difficulties commenting on my posts and I have a hypothesis of why that is. So I want to collect data to test that to verify if I can accept or reject that hypothesis. So if you are having difficulties commenting, please send me a note with your website address. If you CAN comment, please leave a comment to prove inform me that you can. My statistics degree and inner-nerd are becoming useful.
Secondly, if you get a chance to read Dr. Pang’s post and the subsequent comments (one of which is mine), the topic is about “imperfect knowledge” and Pquincy and I are basically speaking about the same thing, which I call faith.
That is what success is all about! Faith!
Yes there is drive, there is effort, there is knowledge, there is common sense, there are resources, communication, opportunity, status, position…there are a lot of things that can play a role in the success (or failure) of reaching a goal, but nothing allows us to reach as high as our potential without faith. Faith allows us to set a goal where the evidence to reach that goal is not present.Faith allows us to set a goal where the evidence to reach that goal is not present. I always teach the ladies I have the privilege to influence (oh yeah and my kids too) that if God puts a dream in your heart, then he also equips you to reach it. I think many people quit just before they break ground** I think of the story about the mustard seed. You know the biggest struggle for any seed is to break ground (especially if it was buried by a squirrel!). That is what determines if it grows or if it dies, succeeds or fails. Think about those that just fall on the ground for whatever reason. They have to really root themselves! “Bloom where you are planted” is one of the mantras I’ve been taught. and never see the reward of their efforts and struggles. That makes me so sad. They didn’t pass the test. The schools don’t give you a diploma if you don’t pass the tests. Why should we get it if we quit before Commencement? After all commencement does mean ‘beginning.’ So many people quit before they’ve even gotten started.
I’m not preaching here because I know that I’ve been guilty of it myself in so many different arenas. Now that I’ve been able to see successes in my life that I have worked for (as opposed to being handed and place on my lap for me), I realize the power God has given me. How hurt he must be that I went without faith for so long and living beneath my potential.
So if I may interpret this quote out of context of Pquincy’s comment: It is good to analyze situations – what you did to “win” and what you could do better or not at all. It will help you to gain additional knowledge and could possibly improve the outcome. However, over-analyzing can be a waste of time (believe me, I also have a C-personality). Some things are just better left to Him. Let go, and Let God.
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Parenting with Aspergers
I came across this post. I wanted to post an excerpt here. It is good to be aware of this, for me with The Dxd Hub, but also for my blogfriends who have adult spectrum suspects in their lives. (that sounds devious…MUAHAAAA!)
The Asperger’s profile
Your partner may have Asperger’s syndrome if he (or she) has most or all of the following traits. Does he . . .
- Have difficulty interpreting body language and facial expressions?
- Have difficulty understanding jokes, metaphor and sarcasm because he takes everything in a very literal way?
- Struggle to maintain friendships?
- Become withdrawn and seem to be uninterested in others, appearing aloof?
- Have poor social awareness and find it hard to imagine how his behaviour impacts on other people?
- Love routines and get very upset if these are broken?
- Have an intense and all-consuming special interest or hobby?
- Have sensory difficulties? Is he oversensitive to touch or smell or noise or to a particular taste (people with Asperger’s have a very limited diet). In some cases, there can be an undeveloped sense.
Adapted from the National Autistic Society website: www.nas.org.uk
So now I am digesting. And researching, again, and came across this list from a Conference in 2005 given by Dr Tony Attwood:
The Parent with Asperger’s Syndrome
Characteristics
• Knowledge of normal childhood abilities and the parental role.
• Perfectionism.
• Regimentation.
• Anger.
• Abuse.
Child’s Perception
• Lack of affection, understanding and support. (Aloof).
• Criticism not compliments.
• Embarrassment in public.
• Fear of the parent’s mood and not to antagonize.
• Fear of the ‘cold’ touch of affection.
• Disagreements between parents.
• Parent has a monologue on their own problems.
• Intolerance of noise and friendships.
• Egocentric priorities.
• Favoritism.
• Feeling a nuisance.
• Desire to leave home or move inter-state or abroad.
Child’s Reaction
• Seeking affection and approval.
• Hatred.
• Escape using imagination, solitude, alternative family.
• Choice of partner.
Issues
• Recognizing the disorder in a parent.
• Resolving past issues.
• Explaining the person to other family members.
Number one, I wanted to journal on this because I need to be aware of the potential effect having a parent with ASD can have on my own children.
Number two, I wanted my siblings to reflect on how we grew up and the perspective we had of my parents. I have given both parents lots of resources and they have bought books themselves to educated themselves in regards to The Elder and his ASD. I debated on whether or not I should even air this laundry out on my blog, but a few months ago, one of my parents said this to me, “I don’t know….maybe I have Aspergers too.” It was a statement that I haven’t forgotten and have made observations on my many trips home to SC. After reading this article…I wonder myself. Not that it would make a difference now that I’m an adult and not even in the same state as my parents…but it sure would explain some things and would also make some things easier to forgive.
